Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Singles Ministry Ideas???

So I am sitting here working on ideas for the new church year. I began to think, maybe advice to our singles. So a little research and boom, I find some great pick up lines for church singles. ( by C Michael Patton) Now I have been off the market for a very long time, and don't remember what a good line was, but I think we have some winners here. Try these on for size:

”I am not overweight. The word ‘glory’ in Hebrew is kabod which according to HALOT literally means ‘heaviness.’ The Bible also says that we are to reflect God’s glory. Therefore, I am just doing what the Bible says.”
“Paul said that it was better to marry than to burn. Therefore, I am under God’s mandate to marry you.”
“Here, let me take care of those tithes.”
“You may not have chosen me, but I have chosen you.”
“I could not help but notice you were exegeting me instead of the text during the sermon.”
”Your name must be grace, because you are irresistible.”
”There are six things that motivate me to talk to you, yea seven that turned my head.”
“Until this moment, I thought I had the gift of singleness.”
During communion say, “Can I get you another drink.”
“The Bible says that God is not concerned with outer appearance . . . neither should you.”
“The Good Book said that I might be visited by angels unaware, but something must be wrong with my interpretation, because I am perfectly aware of you.”
“I noticed you crying during alter call, can I help?”
“God may be the bread of life, but you are the butter.”
“You must have missed The Fall line, because you are lookin’ righteous.”
Sing this to the tune of George Strait’s “Chair”: “Excuse me, but I think you’ve got my rib.”

OK after reading them, maybe they need some work, in fact maybe I am not called to minister to the singles with pick up line advice after all, it must be another's gift, or at least that what Deb says ;-)

1 comment:

Robert House said...

i'm going to try these at school next week and who knows, maybe they will work. 8-D